Angel on my shoulder

As anyone who has ever lost someone very near and dear to them, you know there are different stages of grief. I won't go into how I am feeling just four months since losing my mom, but I will tell you that right after, I probably wasn't a very easy person to be around. I fought it and fought it, but six weeks afterwards, I was angry. In my mind, it wasn't her time to go, and no matter how much I held her and cried while she was in the grips of death, repeating over and over, "Mom, I love you so much", she slipped away.


While I was going through the process of letting her go, I was sitting at work one day and a lady came in to find out if there was anyone available that would go and give her mother private crochet lessons (I work at my LYS). I explained to her that we don't normally do that, to which she told me her mother lives in a care home and would love to come to the store, but just wasn't able to. She then asked me if I crochet, and I told her yes. She asked me for how long had I been crocheting, and I told her about 48 years. She was very persistent, and I began thinking about my mom. I thought, what if this were my mother and she wanted to do this, or anything else for that matter, but wasn't mobile enough to get out? I asked her how old her mom was, and she said 92. WHAT?!?! Right away, she assured me that her mother still had the mind of a 17 year old, and wasn't shaky or anything like that. I thought about how my mom taught me compassion, and how she was always taking care of "the elderly" (she wasn't old at 75, everyone else was to her..ha!). It was as though my mom was perched on my shoulder and telling me to do this, that I would be rewarded for it later on. So, I agreed, and Sue and I set up a date and time. The cute part about it? She was surprising her mom with me for Mother's Day...a little early.


How surprised was I after sitting with Loretta for just an hour, and finding out she had already researched and decided on a pattern, had her yarn and hook, and was excited about getting started! By the time I left her after the second hour, she was crocheting her "zigzag afghan" she wanted to make. She hasn't finished it yet, but she wanted something a little more challenging about three weeks ago. I found a pattern for her, she had some yarn in the color she wanted, and we set to work on a very pretty, lacy pattern that she wants to make for her daughter.


Loretta thanks me profusely after each meeting. I feel like I should be thanking her. I haven't told her about my mom, for what reason, I'm not sure. Maybe avoidance? I'm not sure. In any case, spending time with Loretta has definitely been a rewarding experience!


If you find yourself with a spare hour or two, do yourself a favor and find a way to volunteer a little of your time. Maybe write a letter, or read a book to someone. The care center Loretta lives in is filled with residents/patients that never get visitors. It will make a huge difference in your life, as well as to someone that just happens to be ahead of you in the aging process.